Second Class Tonight October 8, 2009
Posted by Amy Jane (Untangling Tales) in Agility, about me.add a comment
So I was ready to quit, and eat the half-tuition loss.
Then I remembered, I really did pray about this, and asked not to get in if the timing (or whatever) was wrong.
Up to that moment I was running exit scenarios and CMA strategies (ego as well as financial) and having all sorts of self-bashing self-analyses
Like, I sure know how to start things. When will I prove I can *finish* them? and other sweet, uplifting things like that.
I will readily admit this is where a great deal of my emotional dependency (such as it is– it comes and goes) lies in relation to my novel. I have not spent enough (continual) time with it to be attached to it for itself. And on that level it can sink or swim without taking me with it. But as a symbol– not only of completion but of completion *piecemeal* and over time…
Well, that’s representative of too many areas in my life not to have great emotional significance.
But I’m glad Jay urged me to go back.
I didn’t want to go because I’d rather back out and not finish than finish poorly. But he’s right in that even if I only have the hour a week and nothing in-between, I will be significantly ahead of where we were before the class.
Whether or not we’re in a position to compete, I’ve already learned some significant things about myself, Joule, and other people.
- Training need to be about us– the individual pair– and not comparison.
Sure I say I believe that, but I I never had to believe it before because I was always doing so well that comparison wouldn’t be discouraging.
- Even people I’ve thought are uptight– really might just be having a bad day. Or two. Approaching them fresh each time gives them a chance to redeem themselves, and myself a chance to be encouraged by the number of genuine and friendly people there really are in the world.
- Thinking really does wear out a dog better than mere activity.
- I should keep this in-mind for the children…
- Very little information (at my level of studying anything) is only applicable to *one* thing. I short-change myself by thinking so small.
We’re in. September 21, 2009
Posted by Amy Jane (Untangling Tales) in Agility, Daily life.add a comment
So the classes start October 1, and I’ve decided to join the Kennel Club as part of this “experiment”.
I’m excited to try something new, as well as nervous about how my family may respond to a new draw on my time.
We’ve all got our projects now: Jay with his flying (soon to resume lessons), the children starting ballet last week and me with my continuing WW and now this.
I do feel a bit of an imbalance– having two (out-of-home) projects while the rest have only one each, but I hope it will not be a problem. I tell myself only the one is really for me, and that’s true, but it’s also true that no one can tell how much I’m enjoying myself while I’m away.
I’m just away.
I suppose this is why I’ve never been able to find the perfect writers’ group in town: I don’t need one more thing to pull me away. What I have now is enough.
Tried out for the local Agility class September 14, 2009
Posted by Amy Jane (Untangling Tales) in Agility.add a comment
Still waiting for the results, though.
I don’t know if I want in or out. I’m tickled by the idea of bonding with Joule over a project that has performing as an end result. But, other than Joule’s age, I can’t decide if this is the right season for us to dive into this project:
Mainly because I am still working on adding Homeschooling to my “comfortably full” life in a meaningful way, I wonder if being gone another night of the week is the best choice for now.
I thought I’d know by now, since the coordinator said she’d email results either way by Sunday or Monday. And here it is Monday night…
I’m ready to be comfortable either way it goes, but I would truly like to settle mind mind and expectations one way or the other.
16 miles and she’s not even winded August 31, 2009
Posted by Amy Jane (Untangling Tales) in Adventures.add a comment
I suppose I should be thankful, or maybe even pleased with myself that we’re keeping her fit enough, but just now I can only feel resentful.
“She’s wearing a pack next time,” I insisted to Jay. “I don’t care if we do have to buy one for $50. She’ll carry water or something.”
I am frustrated that she can look at me like she expects more *anything* after that kind of outing.
But it was nice to feel like we had let her just be a dog– walking along behind us for hours on end. I did feel very secure in the loft knowing her doggy ears were on and I didn’t have to even think about listening for something/one aproaching our little cabin in the middle of nowhere.
Though, Jay and I were joking by the way back that she’s not very attentive on the trail– saying she’d run into the bear’s butt before she’d notice enough to bark.
Kennel Cough April 28, 2009
Posted by Amy Jane (Untangling Tales) in yuck.add a comment
Joule’s got it, the vet says, and we’re starting antibiotics today, but I can’t think of how she would have caught it, not having any dog interaction (or interaction with dog-people) in the last 5 days.
I’ve gt all sorts of questions now about transmission and reinfection, but I’m holding off on Googling. Figure I’ll just get the vet to tell me so I’m functioning from one source for now.
Yeah, I’m diff w/ my dog than kids. At least today.
CGC Complete April 19, 2009
Posted by Amy Jane (Untangling Tales) in Training.add a comment
Joule did it, and I’m very proud of her.
She’s something of a performer actually. That is, she did better today than she has yet done, and I can’t decide if it’s because she was the focus of my attention (most-likely) or if there’s something about working in a familiar place where we’ve done these same exercises over and over again.
And that could be part of it too.
Next step is getting the PAL/ILP so that she will be eligible to compete in local AKC events for agility. Anchorage has teh events unregistered Dogs may compete in, but I’d rather pat the $35 and keep it local than try and talk Jay into a drive to ANC with a dog.
I don’t think *I’d* want to drive that far.
Thankful March 15, 2009
Posted by Amy Jane (Untangling Tales) in Daily life.add a comment
I’ve made the comment before that Jay and I don’t have children, we have starfish, then I’ll clamp my hand against the front of my shoulder with a slight sucking sound.
We’re a very snugly, touch-oriented family and Joule fits right in. She’s still a leaner, and whenever we’re still for a minute she’ll some over and lean in for attention.
The exception to this is when I’m writing. She’ll either tuck herself in her kennel or lay under the desk (no longer at my feet, with this shallower arrangement– she’s off to the side).
I’ve been realizing lately how perfectly she’s (still!) fitting in. She is positively wild when we go out and will run and jump and climb as long as the opportunity exists, but somehow she is still able to shift gears once we’re indoors and lounge out of the way.
As I’ve been dealing with sickness and writing and other commitments I’ve done fewer outings with Joule, so I mean it when I say I’m thankful for her adaptability. Her company is just perfect.
Fresh Powder March 6, 2009
Posted by Amy Jane (Untangling Tales) in Daily life.add a comment
Joule is such a wimp. She wants to be outside when I am, since I’m “everywhere she wants to be,” but she does not like being out in that snow. But she’ll chase a ball as long as I’ll throw it, and shove her head past her ears into the fluff looking for the ball to bring it back and go again.
I’ve not been walking with her lately, and she’s getting tense but trying to be really good.
Snow’s been falling pretty consistantly this week, and every time I say *This* time we’ll go, the snow shouldn’t be *that* bad, and each time the snow is deeper than the day before; so I wimp out again.
Testing Love January 29, 2009
Posted by Amy Jane (Untangling Tales) in yuck.add a comment
Well, this week has been a test of our commitment.
So far we’re passing.
Yesterday morning Elisha informed me before I was even out of bed that there was pucky on the floor.
He was right. the dog had licked up a bunch of the loose stuff on the floor from the rice box and it was all in little mucky blotches around the hall. I cleaned it up after Jay went to work and later that same morning Joule unloaded all over the kids’ room.
“Are we going to have to get rid of Joule, now?” one of the girls asked.
“No,” I said. “This wasn’t her being bad– it was just her body being sick.”But it was still frustrating and time-consuming to clean up.
Tonight we got home from dinner and games at a friend’s place and walked in to a smell of bad dog.
The only place spared was our bedroom. Jay walked out of the back of the house making the cut-off sign at his neck. I tensed for an ultimatum, but thankfully it never came and I spent the next 2 1/2 hours cleaning up runs from out both ends.
Joule was in the garage the whole time. She’s pressed into my side now, soaking up what love she can before bed and I race through one-handed typing.
Good for my Health January 27, 2009
Posted by Amy Jane (Untangling Tales) in Daily life.add a comment
I’ve been made to get out more than I (know I) would otherwise do without a dog.
There are times when I think, Arg! I have to delay work because the dog needs a walk. But more often I see it as the blessing I took this on for: living accountability.
I *know* I wouldn’t be exercising 1/3 as much without knowing her needs were similar to those of my own I was ignoring.
